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How do I understand different people’s happiness?

Different people have different things that make them happy. If someone’s happiness doesn’t match your own, just accept them and know that you don’t have to adopt their happiness. They don’t have to subscribe to yours either. There is no “right” or “wrong” form of happiness. People are individuals and have unique feelings.

For example, Carrie was dating Jonathan but for some reason, she was not feeling happy. Jonathan treated Carrie really well and was great on paper. Carrie felt horrible about not being truly happy with Jonathan because he was sweet and everyone in her life loved being around him. She eventually broke up with Jonathan and started dating Camron. Camron was a narcissist who belittled Carrie and expected her to always cater to his needs. The two routinely got in fights and made Carrie’s friends and family feel uncomfortable. While people were concerned about Carrie, she was truly happy with Camron. Carrie liked the feeling of being a victim and Camron liked the feeling of victimizing Carrie.

What if a narcissist is supposed to live their life as a narcissist? Who are we to judge? We are here to live our life. While this is certainly not the case for all victims, some people like being in a victim role. For people with this happiness, they belong with a narcissist. Everything has a counterpart. Just because you may not have victim mentality, it does not mean that everyone doesn’t or that they shouldn’t. What if they feel a little pleasure in feeling pain? A pleasure that you don’t know or feel because you were not built that way. People should be allowed to believe what they want to believe and feel what they want to feel. It’s called human respect. Respect each other for having different views. That’s what makes us human.

People constantly try to sell each other their form of joy. They subconsciously look for validation from others without realizing that the feeling of personal happiness is all the validation they need. If someone is not feeling happy, it’s time for them to evaluate what is preventing that feeling, and fix it. If you see someone who is happy, there’s no need to criticize them or their choices. Just let them be and stay focused on your personal quest for joy. If their happiness runs contrary to your own, you always have the choice to accept them or remove them from your life. Either way, your personal joy would be best served by not judging them for having a different outlook.

People even try to debate which country / city is the best place to live. This is completely individual. Some people would love to live on an island while others would feel that there’s not enough things to do. Some people would love to live in the mountains while others would feel disconnected from opportunities. Some people would love to live in a place where the people are friendly while others would get annoyed that everyone in town gets in constant conversations. There is no right answer for what defines happiness to everyone. The right answer for you is determined by the way you feel. God is a combination of all these energies so accepting all of them, and their various forms of happiness, is showing acceptance to the all that is.

Your happiness is so unique.
What makes you strong,
can make me weak.

Your brazen ways create my coy.
What makes you sad,
can bring me joy.

Your laughing tears can be my cry.
What makes us match,
tears in our eyes.

Your merriment I must accept.
What makes you smile,
I will respect.

– Mytika

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